| An eventful evening... |
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| 08:08pm 06/12/2004 |
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mood:  pissed off music: Jack Johnson-Brokedown Melody
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Okay, so first of all, Joe...that guy who was supposed to be super sweet and just a great guy...not so much the truth. Last week, I talked to him on Wednesday, we made somewhat plans to go to First Thursday(art gallaries in Portland do exhibitions and people sell their art on the street). I told him to call me when he was out of school and then we'd figure out where to meet up and whatever. Well, he never called and I haven't talked to him since.
Today, I was at the mall with Troy, who I've kept on a friends level. Kati called me and asked if I was able to talk because she had something to tell me about Joe...and that it was bad. I said I'd call her back. So then when I'm dropping Troy off at home I hug him as usual...but then when we part, he pauses and says, "Sami, remember when we used to kiss goodbye." Aw shit. So I do the whole I don't want to get attached to you thing again and say I'm sorry and blah blah blah. "But Sami I'm not a bad guy to get attached to." To make a longer story short...I kissed him again. I don't even know why...I obviously felt a bit pressured though. HaHa.
So then I anxiously drove over to the ice rink to see Kati at work so she could tell me what the heck was going on with Joe. It's a perk that she is best friends with Joe's brother, Jon, who I'm also friends with. Joe and Jon don't really get along and Jon's a sweet heart so I'm glad he's been watching out for me because he's told Kati to tell me,"Never talk to my brother again." Apparently...last night, Joe was on their couch with some girl and looked to be cuddling. Uhhh...wow. WHAT A JACKASS. I dropped everything for that guy. He completely led me to believe that he wanted to be with me. Left me notes along with other things on my car, left me sweet text messages, gave me a rose, bought me earrings, took me up to Mt. Hood...for nothing? What the hell, I don't understand at all. All I know is he's not the guy I'd expected, he seemed like such an all-around nice guy. OBVIOUSLY I was wrong. I can't wait for him to answer my phone call.
Bobby: I should have listened to you in the first place about the him wanting to just get down my pants thing. From now on...I'm listening to your every word!! |
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| HAHA... |
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| 12:22pm 25/11/2004 |
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mood:  awake music: The Beta Band-Needles In My Eyes
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My dad put my signed Good Charlotte t-shirt up on EBay for me and it's selling for $31!! Wahoo!! I'm happy to get rid of the thing AND get some money for it.
My GC T-Shirt!!
Also Happy Thanksgiving!! |
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| I'M SORRY!! |
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| 11:12am 19/11/2004 |
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mood:  crushed music: Modest Mouse-Gravity Rides Everything
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Last night, after I was off work and the Pioneer's game was over, Amanda and Nicole came and picked me up at the rink. We went over to Boston's to hang out with the guys. I said hello to Troy, which he barely even acknowlaged. He just sat there quitely, the entire time. I mean he's always a quite guy, but typically not to that extent...plus he looked pissed off...or sad, I wasn't really sure.
So we all go over to Josh and Jack's house afterwards. We're watching Fight Club and just hanging out when Troy goes outside. He was out there for awhile when he came back in for awhile. Then he goes outside again...when it's freezing cold! I got the impression that he wanted me to go talk to him. So I go out there to see him sitting on a cooler leaning againest the house. I sat down on the steps and asked him what was wrong. He wouldn't answer me at first...and then after prying it out of him he said,"I miss you." HE MISSES ME. He said so much that should make just want him back, but I can't do that. All I could do was say,"I'm sorry," a million times. I feel horrible...he didn't deserve for me to do this to him. |
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| Shoot me. |
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| 08:41pm 09/11/2004 |
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mood: sadder than EVER. music: Jack J.
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My cat died today. Cali died today. I loved her SO MUCH...she wasn't just my cat. Fuck you you fucking garage door that took her life. I'm such a mess...it's been hours and I can't stop crying.
Me and Cali, sleeping. |
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| No idea what to do. |
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| 11:08am 31/10/2004 |
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mood:  stressed music: The PIxies-Where Is My Mind
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I'm in such a mess. I don't know what to do. I need advice.
So...I've talked about Troy, who I do like...but I've recently met another guy, named Joe. Apparently, Joe likes me a lot. He is just the sweetest guy EVER! When I was taking photos at the football game on Friday and freezing my ass off, he bought me hot chocolate and took it to me. He said, "I could tell you were cold." AWWWWWW. Then, last night, Kati, Joe a bunch of other guys, and I went and saw The Grudge. He came to pick me up at the rink when I got off work, and when I came outside...he had a rose for me! AWWWWWW.
The problem is...I've gotten myself into this relationship with Troy...I guess we're just dating, I don't know. But Troy told someone that he likes me, but he doesn't express it very well to me. Another thing, I haven't even gotten to talk to Joe about Troy yet.
First question...Troy, or Joe? Second guestion...how do I tell Troy if I decide on Joe!?!?!?! Troy will be leaving after hockey season...so I could pull that card.
UGH...this is almost worse than not having anyone. |
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| Sad. |
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| 12:08pm 29/10/2004 |
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mood:  bored music: Hot Rod Circuit-Cool For One Night
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Last night at work, a lady sat on one of our benches...and ripped it right out of the wall. It was hilarious...even thought we shouldn't have been laughing. |
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| Sad... |
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| 04:55pm 22/10/2004 |
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mood: crushed music: Jack Johnson-F-Stop Blues
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I just love it when boys leave messages on my phone crying their eyes out.
Actually I don't...it makes me really sad. |
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| Suggestions?? |
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| 04:34pm 21/10/2004 |
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mood:  artistic music: Coldplay-A Rush of Blood to the Head
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So, I decided I really should use this to post some of my photography. Don't know why I didn't realize this before. If anyone knows of a real good or pretty decent place to upload photos, please share with me. VillagePhoto isn't cutting it. They turn my pictures into a pixelated mess. I need a host that keeps them nice and sharp looking. Help me. |
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| Wow. |
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| 09:57pm 19/10/2004 |
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mood:  accomplished music: Climber-Cavern Lights
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Yesterday, when I went to pick up my paycheck from work, one of the managers told me she needed to tell me something in the office. I was like,"Uhhhhh, crap, what did I do?" But it was nothing bad...she told me I got A RAISE!! I am so happy!! I got a 50 cent raise!! I don't even care that it's more money, it just makes me happy that they obviously think I'm doing a good job and being a good employee. I didn't even ask for it...completely unexpected was I. I honestly love my job. It's been over a year now and I still have fun working at the rink.
Also, THANK YOU to everyone who said Happy Birthday!! |
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| Yay...just yay. |
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| 09:33pm 18/10/2004 |
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mood:  ecstatic music: Jack Johnson-Banana Pancakes
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I ♥♥♥ Troy.
Pure happyness.
I'm 18 as of yesterday. |
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| Oh how great it is... |
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| 04:49pm 15/10/2004 |
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mood: bouncy music: Joshua Radin-Winter
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Last night was great. Troy came and picked me up to go out to dinner. We went to Samarai Sam's. Then he asked me if I wanted to go see a movie but since it was a weeknight I couldn't. :( Aw...he's so cute. Tonight they've got a game. I have to work. I also have to work on my friggin BIRTHDAY. Gah. Yeah, I TURN 18 ON SUNDAY! Woo. Come visit me in the goddamn snack bar. |
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| Pioneer's Game! |
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| 11:21pm 08/10/2004 |
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mood:  nerdy music: G. Love-Baby's Got Sauce
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Hey everyone...go check out the Portland Pioneers game at Mountain View Ice Arena tomorrow night at 7pm, it's $7.00. It'll be really fun plus super exciting...AND you'd get to say "Hi" to me while I'm working AND there's going to be some funny intermission entertainment!! If you people from EHS know Josh and Jack, come watch them play. You could also watch TROooooooooY. The new boy I'm absolutley drooling over. We all hung out last night and went to Red Robbin's and he paid for my dinner...it was so sweet! Then we went bowling and I WON. Three strikes in a row...thank you very much. I beat three guys! I must say I'm very proud of myself. Then everyone else went home and I took Troy to downtown Portland because he'd never been there yet, being from Texas. It was fun, I showed him around and we went for a walk. HeHe...here's a picture of him from the Pioneer's website, he's making a mean face but he has the best smile.
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| BK rocks. |
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| 12:40am 04/09/2004 |
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mood: cheerful music: BEN KWELLER-In Other Words
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Just got back from Ben Kweller. It was awesome. I love that guy. He and his band members are all so adorable! The Unicorns were great also...and very funny.
SO CUTE. |
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| Aw yeah. |
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| 12:37am 03/09/2004 |
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mood: calm music: Ben Kweller-Sha Sha
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YES...getting a massage tomorrow. Very much needed. Time to relax. I just hope I don't fall asleep during it or else then I won't get to enjoy it...better go to sleep then.
Going to Ben Kweller tomorrow with Rachel. Woo! |
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| Hmph. |
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| 01:25am 30/08/2004 |
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mood: lonely music: Beta Band-Dry The Rain
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I wanted so badly to just be single this summer and have fun...which is what I got. Especially after not being single for over a year. But now I'm starting to get lonely. I miss having someone to hug me and cuddle with...which is weird because I'm usually not the type be lonely at ALL. I shouldn't even want to be with another guy after my shitty luck anyway. I'm just setting myself up again.
This is dumb...go to sleep Sami. |
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| Can't wait to get out. |
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| 10:09pm 25/08/2004 |
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mood:  blank music: In The Waiting Line-Zero 7
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"Have you ever been to that point in your life, where you realize that the house you grew up in, isn't really your home anymore?"
Yes. |
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| Zach Braff is hilarious. |
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| 01:02am 25/08/2004 |
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mood: amused music: Coldplay-Don't Panic
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Zach Braff, the writer/directer/star role in Garden State talking about why his film is rated R...
"Some of you have been asking about the rating. Just so you all know, your government doesn't believe a 16 year old should hear the word "fuck" more than twice in a 2 hour period. The second you say "fuck" twice in a movie your film becomes "R". No exceptions. Pretty crazy, huh? You can blow someone's head off, but 2 fucks makes you unwatchable for someone under 17. Unless they have their parent there to explain it to them. "Mom, I understood the first use of the word fuck, but what's with the second - give me guidance please. I've heard one fuck before, but ever since I heard the second one I've had this insatiable desire to rob a liquor store and refer to all women as "ho's"."
He is such a funny guy. He has a Garden State Blog
that he writes in and his entrys just crack me up!! |
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| amazing movie. |
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| 05:49pm 23/08/2004 |
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mood: enthralled music: Frou Frou-Let Go
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Garden State=my new favorite movie of all time. |
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| HOLT F%$KING SHIT. |
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| 03:39pm 20/08/2004 |
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mood:  nauseated music: Jeff Buckley-Last Goodbye
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Word of advice if you're having a garage sale...DO NOT ALLOW ANYONE TO USE YOUR TOILET. My dad let someone at the garage sale use MY bathroom...I woke up to find SHIT all over my toilet. On the seat...in the toilet...and smeared underneath. I cannot even explain how disgusting it was...
I'm sorry I'm even writing about it...it's just that I can't get over the fact.
YAY...tonight I think I'm going to Pioneer Courthouse Square to watch the Goonies!! Blankets and a picnic are always fun. |
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samalis's journal